I admit it: running YouTube Kids on my smartphone is the best way to entertain my daughter, a little more than one-year-old volcano. Is she small for something like that? Yes, of course, she is! But it is an excellent way to change her nappy: a task that should really take a couple of minutes but can turn into a small marathon of tossing, turning, and crying. And yet, the number one rule of every good parent is precisely this: do not give in on giving your smartphone (or tablet) to children. No, they are not the right ‘digital dummies’ for them. Here is what I have learnt in this short but intense time.
Smartphone Child’s Digital Dummy
If our child cries or throws a tantrum, he is trying in his own way to tell us something (especially if he is still too young to talk). Instead of silencing his whining with a mobile phone, we would do better to listen to him and understand his needs and discomfort. Perhaps he is hungry, sleepy, cold, or maybe he is just bored and is attracting our attention. The mobile phone cannot and should not replace the warmth and presence of a parent (a study said this), the quality time that can be spent together playing or doing any other activity. However, never leave devices in young children’s hands so they can watch videos running on autoplay. See what this mum discovered while letting the videos run on autoplay for her baby.
We set a good example
More than words, actions count with children. We cannot expect our children to listen to us when we tell them to put their mobile phones away if we, as parents, are the first ones to live with our smartphones always in hand. If we want our children to give up their mobile phones, let us set a good example first. After all, all paediatricians agree that for children under the age of 2, it is not recommended to use a mobile phone, or any mobile device for that matter, during meals or an hour before going to sleep to calm them down, because from habit to addiction is a short step.
These are the causes that adolescents and pre-adolescents go through. While in children from 2 to 5 years of age, use should be limited to one hour a day. A maximum of a couple of hours for children aged 5 to 8. According to a study by the Bicocca University of Milan, during the pandemic, we gave a smartphone to 58% of children under the age of 10, which was 23%. Today, about 58% of Italian children aged 6 to 10 already have a mobile phone.
When we are all together at the dinner table, before going to bed, or even when we spend time with them, we silence the mobile phone and do not dare touch it for any reason. In this way, children will understand the sacredness of moments spent together without technology and, consequently, the rule we have imposed. Alternatives to the smartphone, especially in the early periods, require our commitment and presence.
Better fresh air, always
We could replace an hour spent in front of the screen with a walk in the open air or the park, or we could read a few pages of a book together with our child. Finally, why not invent a new game, as we did when smartphones did not exist? We could play hide-and-seek, cook imaginary dishes, have tea with stuffed animals, organize a treasure hunt, invent a camping trip, set up a supermarket of goodies, and make potions or soap bubbles. The possibilities are endless, and we can become children again.
